YOU GOTTA RING THEM BELLS

You gotta ring them bells!

Gather around, I've got a story to tell,
About a Manhattan guy that I know very well
He lives at five Riverside, his name is Sheldon Devore,
And he travelled 'round the world to meet the guy next door.
Well there was trouble inside apartment 29 E,
'Cause Sheldon's mother and dad were as upset as can be.
They said we hate to complain dear and we don't like to grouse,
But your nearly 32, you should get out of the house.

You gotta ring them bells, you gotta ring them bells,
You gotta make 'em sing and really ring them bells.
It's such a happy thing to hear 'em ting-a-ling,
You gotta ring - them - bells

Well Sheldon was 31, which he was loathe to admit,
And he had never been loved, which didn't bother him a bit.
And so he sat and he thought, he thought for hours on end,
And said I'll go to Chase, Manhattan, where I got me a friend.
And so he borrowed a thou' and called TWA,
And told his mother and dad that he was up and away.
I'm gonna travel the continent, a month, maybe two,
And haul me home a hus' if it's the last thing I do

You gotta ring them bells, you gotta ring them bells,
You gotta make 'em sing and really ring them bells.
It's such a happy thing to hear 'em ting-a-ling,
You gotta ring - them - bells

He met a Londoner first, but they did not hit it off,
'Cause every time he approached he got a bronchial cough.
And so he went to Madrid and met a handsome Señor,
But he liked to throw the bull and he was no matador.
He also bombed out in Brussels, in Majorca and Rome,
Til' someone said try Dubrovnik, dear, before you go home.
'Cause it's the kind of a town where you'll be likely to fall,
And all the Czechs find the Balkans a ball.

You gotta ring them bells, you gotta ring them bells,
You gotta make 'em sing and really ring them bells,
It's such a happy thing to hear 'em ting-a-ling,
You gotta ring - them  - bells.

And so he went to Debruvnik and the very first day,
He met a guy on the beach who took his reason away.
Yes, it was love at first sight and quite a beautiful scene,
He said my name is Sheldon Devore; he said I'm Norm Saperstein.
He said, 'Are you from New York?' He said 'That can't be denied,
'I've got a swell junior three at number five Riverside.'
'Five? Five Riverside Drive in New York, that's where you live?'
'That's-that's where I live.'  'Five? Are you sure?'
As if that wasn't enough, for Sheldon thought he'd gone deaf,
When he told him his apartment there was 29 F.
Yes, he was 'E', he was 'F', and they had not even met,
Until he travelled the world to Yugoslavia yet.
He'd always been right next door and he would never have known,
If she hadn't tried Debrovnik, he might still be alone.
Well - there's a moral to learn from little Sheldon Devore,
Who had to borrow a thou' to find a  lover next door.
You guys who live in apartments, don't just stare at the wall,
Open up the door and hurry out in the hall.
And...Oh...

Ring them bells, come on, come on, ring them bells,
Make 'em sing, you'd better ring them bells.
It's such a happy thing to hear 'em ting-a-ling.
You gotta swing them, ring them, swing them, ring them be-ells...

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